Let’s go back to 1957. My Grandparents lived on a farm south of Atlanta, Nebraska. I had an Uncle still at home in his 20’s and my Aunt was getting ready to graduate high school. Their oldest son was in California and married. My Dad lived in Holdrege, was married, had a daughter and another to be born in January of 1958 (me). My Aunt was married and had 2 daughters and a son. They lived at McCook.

My Grandma told me many times that her and Grandpa would go to town on Saturday mornings to get groceries. (Note: My Grandma did not have a drivers license at the time. Grandpa let her drive to the edge of town and then he took over. This is important later) They would always stop at my parents house before they went home. Cheri, who wasn’t 2 years old yet, was very attached to her Grandpa and always wanted to go home with him. Grandma said that they would take her and then either bring her back to town or my parents would come out to the farm that evening. My Grandpa and Dad always watched Gun Smoke together. My Mom and my Grandma would visit or be making things in the kitchen. My Grandma’s face always got so soft and sweet when she talked about my Mom. She loved and enjoyed her daughter in law it was obvious.

My favorite story about my Mom that my Grandma always shared was about brown sugar. My Mom was making something. She was telling a story as she packed brown sugar in a measuring cup. Grandma said she thought my Mom was going to pack the entire box (yes boxes back then) in that cup. To this day if a recipe calls for packed brown sugar I hear my Grandma telling that story and chuckling.

As an adult thinking back on my Grandma’s descriptions of their life, I feel like they were just where they wanted to be. They had built what she described as their dream home on the farm. She loved my Grandpa so much and they were enjoying their children and grandchildren. Reading my Mom’s letters and the news papers, I have gained so much respect for my family and what they all went through. I grieved my family as a child but its very different as an adult.

I was planning to end here for this post, but I got another page of my Grandma Bennett’s diary that I hadn’t read the first day. Since I shared the attachment my sister had with our Grandpa Larsen I think this is a good place to add this. My Grandma wrote that Cheryl (my 23 month old sister, I learned of her as Cheri) was still looking all the time for Grandpa’s house. (Grandpa Larsen where they left me) And she kept saying that baby sister is sleeping. WOW!!! This literally took my breath away. I had no idea if my sister even really knew me. She was so little. I have long since let go of all the what ifs. I had the best life with my Grandma and honestly as hard as this all is, I would not give that up for anything. But those two sentences really hit me. 65 years later.

As I have said I feel like I am in a really great place right now. I am allowing myself to feel what I need to feel. Jay and I have so many great things going on in our lives. I guess I want everyone to know that while this is an experience for me, I am still present in my current life. It also feels so good to share some of these stories with the trip coming up. Thank you again for all the support!!